Adding the days and counting the years.

Pages are turned.

The statute of limitations has long since expired on my mourning period, but the dull ache remains.

I remind myself that this relationship was one that was designed for the goodbye. That his going and my staying on that dark October day almost eight years past, was supposed to occur.


And in reality I don’t think I could imagine my life without that painful ending.

The loss has framed my existence.

If he were alive now and I were to have had those years back as his daughter- would I be the women and the mother I have become?

It is doubtful.FullSizeRender

So it is in these days when the winds change and the leaves begin to fall, that instead of focusing on all that was lost I must learn to be grateful for all that was gained.